Reflect on this: God had a Son—a perfect Heir.
Which means that under the shadow of the ancient custom:
Your adoption was unnecessary.
My adoption was unnecessary.
Why is the life of an unwanted child ugly? What makes an unwanted child's life miserable? That's the question.Read the whole thing here.
The initial answer is, "The unwanted child's life is not beautiful because she's not wanted." But it goes deeper than that, doesn't it? No child's life is miserable simply by the bare fact that she is unwanted. Being unwanted doesn't make her life miserable. In this case, it isn't a what which makes the child's life miserable (being unwanted), but rather a who that makes the child's life miserable (the people, the adults, the parents who don't want the child). You see, people are miserable not because of the conditions of their conception, but rather because of the way others treat them afterwards.
The ultimate end of the gospel is to not just make us his friends, but to make us his sons.
Does every child need a father? Increasingly, our society's answer to this question is no, or at least not necessarily. Each night, about forty percent of American children will go to sleep in homes in which their fathers do not live.1 And not only have we as a society lost the presence of fathers, we have lost something more fundamental: We have lost our idea of fatherhood. We are living in a culture of fatherlessness.
The human need to be well-fathered is illustrated by the enormous response to Bob Carlisle's ballad, Butterfly Kisses. Butterfly Kisses is a song that speaks of the tender love between a father and his daughter. Reflecting upon the song's phenomenal success, Bob Carlisle said, "I get a lot of mail from young girls who try to get me to marry their moms. That used to be a real chuckle because it's so cute, but then I realized they don't want a romance for mom; they want the father who is in that song, and that just kills me."
But contrast this, now, with adoption. Adoption is a family idea, conceived in terms of love, and viewing God as father. In adoption, God takes us into his family and fellowship—he establishes us as his children and heirs. Closeness, affection and generosity are at the heart of the relationship. To be right with the God the judge is a great thing, but to be loved and cared for by God the Father is greater.*
Orphan Sunday is November 8th. Your church should recognize it, and I hate to say that.
I hate to say it not because I don’t believe in the mission of Orphan Sunday, churches from every denomination and tradition calling us to orphan care and adoption. I do, enthusiastically. I hate to say it because I know the probable reaction of many of my fellow preachers and church leaders when they see another special emphasis Sunday, especially one that’s part of parachurch ministry: slack jaws and glazed eyes.
After all, our church calendars are marked up enough as it is with everything from, it seems, “Clown Ministry Awareness Sunday” to “Week of Prayer for the Wives of Retired Interim Pastors.” Our “special emphasis” days are so usual that they’re neither special nor particularly emphatic.
But this one’s different.
Orphan Sunday isn’t an emphasis on a program or a “cause” or a special interest group. It’s not an offering or a volunteer recruitment tool. Orphan Sunday could be the Pearl Harbor for spiritual warfare in your church.
Orphan Sunday reminds us all that orphan care isn’t a special emphasis at all. Every Christian is called to care for the fatherless (James 1:27), in different ways to be sure. No one is exempt from this mark of the Christ’s followers. Orphan Sunday carves out a space for us all to encourage one another, together, toward that end.
You don’t have to have a huge program in place for Orphan Sunday, now just a little while away. Go to the website, www.orphansunday.org, and pray through some of the ideas there, to see which, if any, would work in your context.
Over the years I have become aware of how easy it is to focus on justification and fail to prioritize the doctrine of God’s adopting grace. Historically, in my own ministry, and in Sovereign Grace in general, we have tended to emphasize the doctrine of justification over adoption. Please don’t misunderstand; we must never teach less on justification. The doctrine of justification must always remain primary because all the saving benefits (including adoption) depend upon justification by faith alone through grace alone in Christ alone.
Justification provides the foundation for adoption. And, rightly understood, justification positions us to fully appreciate adoption. We cannot speak of the Fatherhood of God apart from the cross.
But adoption is also distinct from justification. Without separating them, we need to distinguish between them.
Myth: All adopted children will experience problems and issues.
Reality: While some adopted children will experience problems and issues, the pervasiveness of such problems is not as significant as is generally assumed. The heart of the matter, however, is that adoptive families have an opportunity to provide a child with unconditional love for a lifetime – and that love has the power to transform the lives of everyone involved.
“If you want to judge how well a person understands Christianity, find out how much he makes of the thought of being God’s child, and having God as his Father. If this is not the thought that prompts and controls his worship and prayers and his whole outlook on life, it means that he does not understand Christianity very well at all.
For everything that Christ taught, everything that makes the New Testament new, and better than the Old, everything that is distinctively Christian as opposed to merely Jewish, is summed up in the knowledge of the Fatherhood of God. “Father” is the Christian name for God. Our understanding of Christianity cannot be better than our grasp of adoption.”
What if God’s will comes in two brands: Individual and Universal.
The first answers the questions we’re asking: What should I study? Who should I marry? Where should I live? God’s individual will is for my life only. It’s often grainy, hard to get at, often not making sense until in hindsight.
The universal will of God answers the questions God most wants us to ask. Care for your enemies. Don’t steal. Take only your daily bread. God’s universal will applies to all Christians everywhere, regardless of age, denominational bent or nationality. God’s universal will is frighteningly clear much of the time, hard to wriggle around.
God wills that some Christians get married (individual will) but that every Christian respect and protect marriage (universal will).
God wills that some Christians move to Africa (individual will) but that every Christian care for the poor in some way (universal will).
God wills that some Christians become teachers (individual will) but that every Christian pass on what they know about God to others (universal will).
So where does adoption fall?
Individual (only a select few are supposed to do it) or universal (every Christian who isn’t nuts or destitute should do it)?
They’d never seen the sun, and they’d never felt the wind. They had never heard the sound of a car door slamming or felt like they were being carried along a road at 100 miles an hour. I noticed that they were shaking and reaching back to the orphanage in the distance. Suddenly it wasn’t a stranger asking, “Are they brothers?” They seemed to be asking it, nonverbally but emphatically, about themselves.
I whispered to Sergei, now Timothy, “That place is a pit! If only you knew what’s waiting for you—a home with a mommy and a daddy who love you, grandparents and great-grandparents and cousins and playmates and McDonald’s Happy Meals!”
But all they knew was the orphanage. It was squalid, but they had no other reference point. It was home.
My 27 years as the senior pastor of Covenant Life Church were filled with countless joys. Among my happiest memories are the times parents introduced me to their newly adopted children.
Covenant Life, like so many churches, is filled with stories of parents willing to travel to distant lands, to invest thousands of dollars, and sometimes to enter dangerous and impoverished countries with one purpose in mind: to adopt a child.
Meeting these children was a unique joy. Each time I met these adopted children, I felt God’s pleasure. Each time I admired the selflessness and compassion of these parents. And each time I was reminded of the Savior “who loved me and gave himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).
Because God creates via words (Jer. 51:15-16), he uses preaching to call into existence spiritual realities that didn't exist before (Ezek 37:4). The very act of preaching makes things happen; it forces a confrontation not just between people and ideas, but also between people and Spirit. A pastor's preaching on the cosmic and missional aspects of adoption will not come back void. It will create a reality within the church, wherever there are those who are willing to hear the voice of Christ, who don't harden their hearts but listen in belief (Heb. 3:7-4:16).
Dr. Russel Moore's highly anticipated book, "Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches" is now available. I've got my copy and will be working through it. I'll post my thoughts and reviews here over the next few weeks.
On Monday we received our son’s Decree of Adoption in the mail. This is the document that tells us his adoption is final. Declared. Legal.
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“It is hereby ordered, adjudged, and decreed by the Court:(1) That from the date of the entry of this Decree herein, the said minor is declared adopted for life…
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In light of this, here are some thoughts on our adoption in Christ:
- You have been “adopted for life”! Eternal life to be exact! Our earthly adoption of our son is only temporary. God’s adoption of us is even greater because it is eternal.
- You have experienced a complete substitution of family. You have a new family, a new Father, new perfect elder brother (Jesus), and new brothers and sisters (the church!). We may still have responsibilities to our earthly family but our ultimate responsibility is to our heavenly Father and his will and purposes.
- You are a heir of everything that Christ will inherit!
- You have the same legal status, rights, obligations as a natural child of God.
"Our hopes that we shall persevere must be founded, not upon our own strength, for that will fail us, but upon the mercy of God, for that will not fail."
-Matthew Henry
Adoptive Parent Cindy writes:The federal adoption tax credit has made our adoption much more affordable. And we are hoping it will still be around when we complete our adoption so we can take advantage of it. The tax credit is set to expire in December 2010 unless Congress votes to continue it.
It would seem nearly impossible for one to make the act of rescuing an orphan sinful. However, as someone recently thrust into the process, I have become well aware that adopting offers a myriad of opportunities for sinful behavior. I have even seen adopting Christians forget about the person they are rescuing because they are only concerned with how the process is affecting them at a given moment of delay or difficulty. Blinded by the deceitfulness of sin, what should inherently mean good for another is devoted to the altar of self. Feeling the natural tendency of my own heart, I have had to pray constantly, “Lord save me from turning the adoption of two Ethiopian orphans into an act of self-serving wicked idolatry.”
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It is true corruption abounds and many requirements may seem arbitrary to us. The process can be grueling when you are relying on folks who may take the rainy season off or may simply decide not to work on a given day, due to a solar eclipse. But, instead of taking on the persona of a pro-wrestler, thumping our chest and saying, “We deserve them because we are better than you!” should we not first remember what’s at stake. Is it just about us getting our kids? Or is it about rescuing children who desperately need a family. The American in general may not be on board with this, but the Christian should be.
I hate Sanctity of Human Life Sunday because I’m reminded that we have to say things to one another that human beings shouldn’t have to say. Mothers shouldn’t kill their children. Fathers shouldn’t abandon their babies. No human life is worthless, regardless of skin color, age, disability, economic status. The very fact that these things must be proclaimed is a reminder of the horrors of this present darkness.
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We’ll always need Christmas. We’ll always need Easter. But I hope, please Lord, someday soon, that Sanctity of Human Life Day is unnecessary.
Adoption is, on the one hand, gospel. In this, adoption tells us who we are as children of the Father. Adoption as gospel tells us about our identity, our inheritance, and our mission as sons of God. Adoption is also defined as mission. In this, adoption tells us our purpose in this age as the people of Christ. Missional adoption spurs us to join Christ in advocating for the helpless and the abandoned.
As soon as you peer into the truth of the one aspect, you fall headlong into the truth of the other, and vice-versa. That’s because it’s the way the gospel is. Jesus reconciles us to God–and to each other. As we love God, we love our neighbor; as we love our neighbor, we love our God. We believe Jesus in “heavenly things”–our adoption in Christ–so we follow him in “earthly things”–the adoption of children. Without the theological aspect, the emphasis on adoption too easily is seen as mere charity. Without the missional aspect, the doctrine of adoption too easily is seen as mere metaphor.
In Scripture there is no such thing as an adopted child. Adopted is a past tense verb, it is not an adjective. Those who have been brought into the household and family of God are really and truly part of the household of God sharing with their brothers and sisters everything that it means to be in Christ.
I would suggest that you seriously consider not only supporting, but also doing adoption, both spiritually ... and also in terms of finding children who have no mom and dad who could be folded into a family—just like God planned from eternity to fold sinners like us, through Christ, into his everlasting family of joy.
I was reminded last night of something I already knew, though I often try to forget it. It is one of the more sobering realities of adoption – the fact that there is no adoption without loss and pain . . . and grief.Read the whole thing here.
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Last night I saw through my son’s tears and heard in his words the deep, heartbreaking grief that lurks in the shadows of adoption. It was an intense sorrow caused by the loss he feels and understands now more than ever before. My son’s grief is for that which never was and for what will never be.
The teens who do want to be adopted are working on a deadline: age 18. That's when you "age out" and can no longer be adopted.Read the whole article here.
Think about how many times since you turned 18 that you have seen your family -- the holidays, birthdays, weddings -- or needed them, financially, emotionally or for advice. More than 55 percent of men and 46 percent of women ages 18 to 24 still live with their parents, according to the U.S. Census in 2002. In Boulder County, that translates to more than 11,000 young adults.
Well, it seems as though life will be like this picture for a while. That's OK.
