I don't know how many people actually read this blog. That's OK. Last time I looked, it wasn't that many.
However, if you do happen to read this, please consider praying for our friends Doug and Jennifer. A few years ago, they were given custody of their two nephews. This became permanent after a long court battle that ended about two years ago. The boys have flourished in their home, and are doing great. They play football and love to have fun. I think the oldest is 13.
Doug and Jennifer have found out that the biological mother wants custody back, and there is a court hearing tomorrow. She has (according to our friends) made very little attempt over the past 5 years to be in the boys lives. Any times she's scheduled, she has not shown up for. If the court were to rule in favor of the mom, it would be devastating, both for our friends, but mainly for the boys.
If you read this, please pray for our friends, and the right outcome of this situation.
Thanks!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
C.J. Mahaney on Adoption
From "C.J.'s view from the cheap seats"...
Over the next few weeks, C.J. Mahaney will study the Doctrine of Adoption in his blog. I'm sure it'll be well worth the time to read.
My 27 years as the senior pastor of Covenant Life Church were filled with countless joys. Among my happiest memories are the times parents introduced me to their newly adopted children.
Covenant Life, like so many churches, is filled with stories of parents willing to travel to distant lands, to invest thousands of dollars, and sometimes to enter dangerous and impoverished countries with one purpose in mind: to adopt a child.
Meeting these children was a unique joy. Each time I met these adopted children, I felt God’s pleasure. Each time I admired the selflessness and compassion of these parents. And each time I was reminded of the Savior “who loved me and gave himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).
Over the next few weeks, C.J. Mahaney will study the Doctrine of Adoption in his blog. I'm sure it'll be well worth the time to read.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Adopted for Life - Outtakes
I've been working through "Adopted for Life" by Russell Moore. I'm planning on putting together posts on each chapter, but I've run across this gem from Chapter 7.
Because God creates via words (Jer. 51:15-16), he uses preaching to call into existence spiritual realities that didn't exist before (Ezek 37:4). The very act of preaching makes things happen; it forces a confrontation not just between people and ideas, but also between people and Spirit. A pastor's preaching on the cosmic and missional aspects of adoption will not come back void. It will create a reality within the church, wherever there are those who are willing to hear the voice of Christ, who don't harden their hearts but listen in belief (Heb. 3:7-4:16).
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches Now Available
Dr. Russel Moore's highly anticipated book, "Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches" is now available. I've got my copy and will be working through it. I'll post my thoughts and reviews here over the next few weeks.Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Matt Chandler
This has nothing to do with adoption - yet everything at the same time. Well worth your four minutes.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
OK. Now it is.
Well, it seems we have our answer.
Let me explain. No, wait, not enough time. Let me sum up.
Our prayers over the past 24 hours have been that birthmom and dad would be in agreement, and that this wouldn't escalate into a nasty court battle. We found out just a little bit ago that the caseworker, birthmom and dad met today, and things went very well. Dad is now completely on board with the adoption, and believes its the right direction for them to go. PRAISE GOD! This is an unbelievable answer to prayer.
Together, birthmom and dad have chosen two couples that they want to consider, and we're not one of those couples.
Here's the scoop. We are grieving because this didn't work in our direction, but given all the possibilities that didn't include us, this is the best possible outcome in my mind. Birthmom and Dad agree on this, there is no nasty court battle to come, and the baby will be placed with a good family. We rejoice in those things. God did answer our prayers, in a truly miraculous way. It wasn't quite the way we would have wanted (selfishly), but this is a good thing.
Thank you for all of your prayers the past few days. We have been encouraged by our friends and family who have been standing with us in prayer. I would humbly ask that you keep praying for us - discouragement will be in our lives the next few weeks / months.
Also, keep the birthmom and dad in your prayers. She's 35 weeks along and has been having contractions the past few days. Please pray that they would continue to have unity and peace in this process.
As for us, we're going to complete our homestudy and see what God does. We're not necessarily getting back into pursuing adoption (this is too new to decide for sure), but we want to be ready.
Again, thank you for your prayers and encouragment. We love y'all.
Let me explain. No, wait, not enough time. Let me sum up.
Our prayers over the past 24 hours have been that birthmom and dad would be in agreement, and that this wouldn't escalate into a nasty court battle. We found out just a little bit ago that the caseworker, birthmom and dad met today, and things went very well. Dad is now completely on board with the adoption, and believes its the right direction for them to go. PRAISE GOD! This is an unbelievable answer to prayer.
Together, birthmom and dad have chosen two couples that they want to consider, and we're not one of those couples.
Here's the scoop. We are grieving because this didn't work in our direction, but given all the possibilities that didn't include us, this is the best possible outcome in my mind. Birthmom and Dad agree on this, there is no nasty court battle to come, and the baby will be placed with a good family. We rejoice in those things. God did answer our prayers, in a truly miraculous way. It wasn't quite the way we would have wanted (selfishly), but this is a good thing.
Thank you for all of your prayers the past few days. We have been encouraged by our friends and family who have been standing with us in prayer. I would humbly ask that you keep praying for us - discouragement will be in our lives the next few weeks / months.
Also, keep the birthmom and dad in your prayers. She's 35 weeks along and has been having contractions the past few days. Please pray that they would continue to have unity and peace in this process.
As for us, we're going to complete our homestudy and see what God does. We're not necessarily getting back into pursuing adoption (this is too new to decide for sure), but we want to be ready.
Again, thank you for your prayers and encouragment. We love y'all.
It's not over... yet!
In Tricia's previous post, she said that this was a journey of ups and downs. Sunday was definitely one of the downs.
But, we were unsettled about some things. I'm not even sure that I know all the things we were unsettled about, but there were a lot of unanswered questions for us. So, we did some praying. We decided that we needed to talk to the caseworker and at the very minimum, ask her to explain some things. At the very maximum, ask her if we could meet the birthmom and ask her to reconsider.
So, we called the caseworker. She said that what we were experiencing was typical of people who go through loss. That may be true, but we were experiencing something else. It was a sense that we couldn't just let it end, that this story wasn't written yet. We said that we would like to meet the birthmom, even though she's initially said no. The caseworker then told us that this may turn into a custody battle.
If the birth father doesn't give up his rights, it then proceeds to the courts. When the baby is born, the adoptive parents take custody, and there's a petition for adoption filed. At that point, the father would then challenge the adoption, and a hearing would be set for three to six months out. At that time, he would have to prove to the court that he's a capable father, and the adoptive parents would have to prove he isn't.
The court could rule in either direction, and if the court rules in favor of the father, the adoptive parents would lose custody, and be responsible for the father's legal fees. The birthmom would also lose custody, because she's signed a TPR (Termination of Parental Rights).
The caseworker wanted to know if we'd be up for that. At this point, we're willing to take the risk. This could be a very expensive, long drawn out thing. That is, if she reconsiders and chooses us. That's up in the air.
The caseworker told us that on Monday after the birthmom decided against us, that she gave the birthmom another family to look at, and the birthmom liked them. Later that day, this family called the caseworker and told her they weren't interested. The caseworker told us she's never had this happen before. All these other families are falling through, and even though we've been rejected, we just don't seem to go away. She also said that she's running out of options for adoptive parents.
So, where are we at? We don't know. The caseworker is going to re-present us to the birthmom today and ask her to reconsider. She's also going to meet with the father today, and explain what he'll have to go through, and what he's going to be putting the baby through if he doesn't go along with this adoption. If the birthmom decides she wants to meet us, we'll leave here on Friday and try to meet her over the weekend.
Here's the point. Please pray that the father has a change of heart about this adoption. Our prayer is that God would humble him, and help him to realize that he can't do this as he is right now, and that even if he were to win in a court battle, the state would most likely take the baby right out of his arms at the courthouse anyway. Then, he has no control. Our prayer is that he would see this situation with clarity. Pray (please) that this wouldn't go to court, and that this would be resolved easily. Our prayer is also that the birthmom would seriously reconsider us. Would you join us in praying for these things?
Thank you for your support, encouragement, and your prayers through this whole ordeal. This is where real life happens - in the trenches.
S.D.G
Kyle & Trish
But, we were unsettled about some things. I'm not even sure that I know all the things we were unsettled about, but there were a lot of unanswered questions for us. So, we did some praying. We decided that we needed to talk to the caseworker and at the very minimum, ask her to explain some things. At the very maximum, ask her if we could meet the birthmom and ask her to reconsider.
So, we called the caseworker. She said that what we were experiencing was typical of people who go through loss. That may be true, but we were experiencing something else. It was a sense that we couldn't just let it end, that this story wasn't written yet. We said that we would like to meet the birthmom, even though she's initially said no. The caseworker then told us that this may turn into a custody battle.
If the birth father doesn't give up his rights, it then proceeds to the courts. When the baby is born, the adoptive parents take custody, and there's a petition for adoption filed. At that point, the father would then challenge the adoption, and a hearing would be set for three to six months out. At that time, he would have to prove to the court that he's a capable father, and the adoptive parents would have to prove he isn't.
The court could rule in either direction, and if the court rules in favor of the father, the adoptive parents would lose custody, and be responsible for the father's legal fees. The birthmom would also lose custody, because she's signed a TPR (Termination of Parental Rights).
The caseworker wanted to know if we'd be up for that. At this point, we're willing to take the risk. This could be a very expensive, long drawn out thing. That is, if she reconsiders and chooses us. That's up in the air.
The caseworker told us that on Monday after the birthmom decided against us, that she gave the birthmom another family to look at, and the birthmom liked them. Later that day, this family called the caseworker and told her they weren't interested. The caseworker told us she's never had this happen before. All these other families are falling through, and even though we've been rejected, we just don't seem to go away. She also said that she's running out of options for adoptive parents.
So, where are we at? We don't know. The caseworker is going to re-present us to the birthmom today and ask her to reconsider. She's also going to meet with the father today, and explain what he'll have to go through, and what he's going to be putting the baby through if he doesn't go along with this adoption. If the birthmom decides she wants to meet us, we'll leave here on Friday and try to meet her over the weekend.
Here's the point. Please pray that the father has a change of heart about this adoption. Our prayer is that God would humble him, and help him to realize that he can't do this as he is right now, and that even if he were to win in a court battle, the state would most likely take the baby right out of his arms at the courthouse anyway. Then, he has no control. Our prayer is that he would see this situation with clarity. Pray (please) that this wouldn't go to court, and that this would be resolved easily. Our prayer is also that the birthmom would seriously reconsider us. Would you join us in praying for these things?
Thank you for your support, encouragement, and your prayers through this whole ordeal. This is where real life happens - in the trenches.
S.D.G
Kyle & Trish
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Ups and Downs
We knew this process would have ups and downs. Right now we're in one of the downs. We just heard from Ben who spoke with the birthmom's grandmother. She said the birthmom didn't seem interested in us because of the distance. We know that God is Sovereign over all things, but selfishly we pray that the birthmom would be okay about the distance and pick us to be the parents for her child. But if that is not the decision that's made, please pray that we would still see God's hand in this and give Him the glory for allowing us to walk through this process.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Update
So, we just talked with the case worker. The other family backed out of this situation on their own. What does all this mean? Well, right now the birthmom only has our profile in her hands for consideration. She could see something in there that she doesn't like, but she could also pick us. All I can say right now is WOW!
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