Embracing the Grief of Adoption

Last night, we had dinner with some new friends. We've known them for a while, but not all that well - we go to the same church. (We are consistently meeting new people, and asking them how long they've gone to our church. Most of the time we hear answers like "four years.") At one point, Kevin said "Adoption is filled with loss."

There's loss for families who give up a child for Adoption. There's loss for adoptive parents who aren't placed with a child. There's loss for the child.

Here's an article from AdoptiveDads.org that raises this issue.

I was reminded last night of something I already knew, though I often try to forget it. It is one of the more sobering realities of adoption – the fact that there is no adoption without loss and pain . . . and grief.

...

Last night I saw through my son’s tears and heard in his words the deep, heartbreaking grief that lurks in the shadows of adoption. It was an intense sorrow caused by the loss he feels and understands now more than ever before. My son’s grief is for that which never was and for what will never be.

Read the whole thing here.